Sry I called you an 8
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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