I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize