this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
