can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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