If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize