just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
How does it feel to date your dad?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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