You made me cry and you don't even care
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
