no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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