U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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