Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize