At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
