Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
honey bunches of taint.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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