She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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