so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
