Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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