The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize