Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
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and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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