I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
