shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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