Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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