My room smells like vodka and shame
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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