I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
