Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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