BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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