Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Randomize
