Well douche your snatch and let's go!
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize