I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
