I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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