I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
