ya dads aren't the best wingmen
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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