The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Randomize