shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
