I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
