Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
