I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Randomize
