This girl is more easily done than said...
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
