next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
