All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I have aggressive nipples.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
