I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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