So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
If I die, sorry about rent.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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