I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize