Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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