lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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