Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
