Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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