So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
