so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize