Define "chronic" masturbator.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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