The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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