Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist