I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize