At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize