im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
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Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
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i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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